About Myself!

It is funny that two people may have the same feelings about something, yet reach opposite conclusions. What keeps someone out of the vast ocean may draw someone towards it. This is the “Unknown” I am talking about. Quite often, I got repelled by the element of uncertainty associated with the “Unknown”. This time though, I chose to make an exception to my policies. That is why; I landed in Pune on a glittering Diwali night. I was received by a friend of my father, who, quite fitting to the situation I had met for the first time.

I was not sure whether my love affair with the “Unknown” would last. I accept that my decision was probably based on emotion rather than logic. When I say emotion, I unfortunately mean negative emotions here. These negative emotions were the product of 3 and ½ years of Manipal. Then, I had definitely not paid heed to the age old saying “Do not put all your eggs in one basket”. What had followed Manipal was an extremely painful and distressing 6 months in Noida .I had writhed in pain, anger and disappointment .It was one place where perhaps I made a fool of myself every single day. The simple yet important lesson of life got planted in my head – “Every man for himself”.

As I left Noida, rejected in both my professional and personal life, my first tryst with the Unknown had already been setup. This was the God’s own country. I do not know if it was the result of my low expectations or what, but things started falling in place remarkably well. The kind of attention I got there was something similar to my school days when I used to be the toast of every eye. It was hardly a month into my stay at Trivandrum when I had the foresight that this is going to flourish into the “Best Season” of my life. Not long ago I had a “Reason” in life. A Reason which was there to aid me emotionally and spiritually. However, true to its nature, a reason is supposed to depart at an inconvenient time to leave you alone. I was lucky that it was followed by this season. This was a season filled with joy and laughter. This was the season to grow and laugh. This was one season where I fell completely in love with myself. Like never before.

This Season was the one reason I fell in love with the Unknown. I chose Pune. As I started my journey in Pune, I saw people who precisely knew why they were here. I, however, had no idea why I was in Pune. A friend of mine recently pointed it out to me that it takes years to foster a healthy bonding, a bonding which is above the realms of demand and supply. Agreed. I accept that for me, an emotional void might be here to stay for long. I, however, believe that in this race of life, even the best car needs a pit stop. That pit stop often goes a long way in defining how you run and finish the race. Pune is my pit stop. I have often tried to be in total control of my life only to fail in the end. Life is too dynamic to be controlled.  Sometimes it is vital to let life take its course. It has a tendency to throw unpleasant as well as pleasant surprises. Face the unpleasant ones with courage, so that when the pleasant ones arrive, may be from the past, may be from unexpected appreciations, and may be from somewhere close by, you are ready to cherish those, as I might be doing now J . You never know when  the series of lasts might make way to the series of firsts .